Here’s the Problem: Life and Style Magazine ripped the story wide open about a very confused mom and daughter who are fighting to claim Michael Lohan is the girl’s father. It’s like yelling to the world, “SERIOUSLY! I’M NOT A CREEPY – I’M SCRATCHING DOWN THERE BECAUSE I HAVE HERPES!”
Actual Problem: My favorite part of the story is how the judge ruled that Lohan is the dad because he didn’t show up for his paternity test (he claims he was on probation). As if being an absent minded deadbeat proves fatherhood.