Problem: Professional moron and well-coiffed embarrassment to journalism
Rick “Rolled” Sanchez was fired this week for saying stupid shit straight
out of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion about American Hero Jon Stewart
and the Chosen people.
Yet Rick was not fired for earlier this year being completely incapable of
locating Hawai’i (an American state and birthplace of our current
president!) on a map and believing that Iceland was too cold to harbor
volcanoes, due both to its frigid climes and lack of sufficient syllables. Apparently, a man tasked with informing America’s teeming
masses making unbelievably dumb statements on live television is
insufficient grounds for termination at America’s Most Venerable Broadcast
News station; one must also make unbelievably bigoted statements in response
to being clowned on for said unbelievably dumb statements.
Actual Problem: Sadly, it is apparent that only the follicular tragedy of my
birth prevents me from becoming a cable news anchor on CNN. I (sigh)
suppose there is still always Headline News.
**Special Thanks to my favorite Ant for writing this post and bringing a bit of intellectualism to our site. His creatively structured hairline is always welcome at HTP.