Here’s the Problem: Jessica Simpson and the One Who Got Away

Here’s the Problem:  Reports are out saying that J Simps is totes distraught since she found out Nick Lashey popped the question to that retired VJ.

Actual Problem:  Really Jess?  Did you think there was a chance that maybe you’d get him back?  I mean, he put up with your stupidity when you were hot.  You think he’d come knocking down your door to hear your nonsense while you’re wearing a size 16 onesie**? NO!

**No offense all you size 16 onsie wearers.  You’re hot.  I’m sure you are.  It’s just that Nick is more the market for some of this than some of that.

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