[BLOG KETCHUP – Chapter 5]
A series of posts about everything I missed while I was on liquid Vicoden-induced bed rest
Here’s the Problem: OMG you guys! Who wants to spend 2 hours watching people who are better than you get nicer things than you can afford? Answer: EVERYONE! Why? Because we like seeing people get overly excited about shit as if the most famous person in the world hand picked them to get a new car. Cuz that’s what happened.
Actual Problem: As soon as Oprah utters a syllable of one her favorite things it goes on back order till the Chinese sweatshop workers that makes this crap * grow skin back on their fingers. Next year I watch this east coast live.
*It’s called a ziplock, but that won’t get the same reaction sticking out of a stocking.