Here’s the Problem: Pistachios

Here’s the Problem:  Have y’all seen the ads for Wonderful Pistachios featuring every fake famous person and their mother?  Let’s list all these nut cracking stars:

Levi Johnston

Lewis Black

Adrienne Curry and A Brady

Wee Man

The Beauty Queen who calls it “the Iraq and so forth”

Snooki

Rod Blagojevich

The Fucking Peanuts Gang

The Goddamn Keyboard cat

Yes, they’re very funny, but let’s not forget – THEY’RE FOR FUCKING NUTS.  We live in a world where computers weigh ounces, cars run on electricity, Squand exists and the best ad campaign in the world is for PISTACHIOS??

Actual Problem:  Half Days that feel like Full Weeks.

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