Here’s the Problem: This is probably a really interesting article. Read it. Or don’t. I didn’t. I’ll promote it anyway. My friend didn’t write it. Not even my other friend. I just saw it, ok?
There’s a girl who looks like Doug on the internet. Trust me. I know things.
Listen, I’m in a mood. It’s not a bad one. It’s actually kinda funny. Hey! You specifically – look toward me. See – that kinda mood. I am going to ruin watching So You Think You Can Dance tonight. Hear me, Jason?
Actually, Jason – can you hear me? Let’s move in here. Also, Kara has a rain CD that can help you fall asleep if you’re having trouble. She swears by it.
Actual Problem: I already have a funeral plot. Did you know that? My parents got me one. It’s really thoughtful of them. The ultimate birthday gift… in opposite world.
Also, use the internet wisely, friends. If you got engaged, put a picture of your finger with the ring on Facebook. That is actually what facebook is for. Not for Farmville. For your ring. Thanks America.